FEAR of having what we say or do always be interpreted. How many of us haven't been through this at least once?
It's as if we live in a kind of bubble of the dictatorship of those who, it seems, their only occupation is to "know everything" about others, not necessarily to inform themselves (for information, the modern, rational man uses access to the press, especially now through the Internet), but some, not to say most, make a real profession of talking about others, especially negatively, which is dangerous and in many cases is called gossip, if of course something is not achieved much more serious, namely slander.
Today, however, I thought we should talk about something a little deeper than apparently simple, but in reality quite complicated gossip, namely the INTERPRETATION of the meaning of the things we do, of the real content of the conversations we have with others on a daily basis or almost, how our small and limited point of view, somewhat like the dot at the end of this sentence (.), can be and often I would say is, interpreted and re-interpreted, giving it various meanings and forms, on which the author had no intention or necessity at all or almost to have understood and interpreted his message in a specific way.
Where does this desire, somewhat unnatural to be sure, of the common man come from to interpret and sometimes re-interpret what the other person says and does?
From a low level of self-perception, from a low or very low self-esteem, from a level of perception of one's own value close to zero and sometimes even reaching the limit!
Why do we say this?
Well, a clear minded person, aware of his own worth, who aims to make a difference on this Earth and not just survive like a leaf in the wind, besides the fact that he doesn't care about gravity at all anymore the way in which his words and actions will be, or are interpreted, but in the way in which they can contribute to a greater extent to the improvement and implementation of a more intense, more refined way of civilization, the person truly realized in life, he simply does not intend to spend good minutes reflecting on how this terminally ill society of oversaturated ego and other chronic and incurable mental and physical diseases in this system of things interprets them in a certain way or in another's thoughts and actions, let alone allow herself precious time and the absolutely undeserved luxury to interpret certain things one way or another and make her decisions in life taking into account those interpretend!
Bless the saint!
A person who is fulfilled and in agreement with his own values, with high self-esteem and self-respect, is really not interested in the interpretations of his words and actions by others!
No matter how stupid or silly it may seem!
She's just not interested!
Because he knows that he has an interesting and beautiful life in which he achieves every day even a little of what he set out to do, he knows that the purpose of his life is to make a difference on this Earth and he puts in every day the maximum necessary effort to achieve maximum efficiency to ensure that it fulfills its purpose!
People who lived 70-90% of their lives under communism always felt the terror of interpreting and re-interpreting their own message, their own attitude, they had to be very careful in using words and how they are understood and at the same time, they had to learn how to always mask their true character and always hide their true feelings - to wear a mask, as it was said before the pandemic and as it is known and expressed - to be pretended, that is. Then, of course, this had become a necessity - primarily from the desire to keep his head on his shoulders, literally even, to keep his relationships untainted by any trace of betrayal, which then had dire and dangerous consequences. People risked their freedom by saying even a fragment of a word that could create the impression of disobedience and treason to rule in the sick minds of some of those who were at the helm of the destinies of the common man in those dark times.
I lived then and I know from my own experience what it was like and it was clearly seen what chaos all those things led to in time, in Europe and beyond.
This is one of the reasons why people don't really understand each other, almost everything is interpreted and re-interpreted ad infinitum, it's hard to connect, and it's even harder to maintain relationships between people,but it's like a miracle that they're still possible.
What exactly in human behavior attracts and leaves room for interpretations?
As I said above, the lack of a sense of one's own value, the lack of a viable self-respect, the lack of desire to contribute to the good running of things in the first place in our own life and to make a real difference on Earth, is a decisive factor that our attitude can leave a lot to be desired and the way we express our own point of view and the way we manifest different things in life leaves room for interpretations.
The problem with the interpretations of other people's words and actions, when you exceed the dose of common sense, of real kindness and of showing a proper interest towards the other, meaning mainly towards the good and happiness of the person in front of you, is the field of mental health and it would be beneficial first of all for the sufferer to get over his pride and unnecessary feelings of superiority and to ask for psychological help to be able to cope and especially to keep under control the desire to interpret what comes from to the other person.
The person who is used to interpreting to his liking everything that comes from outside, would do well to replace interpretation with understanding.
Interpreting is clearly different from understanding in that understanding does not have a very large number of versions of a certain fact or event, while in expression there is a very large number of versions, most of them being untrue. Simple speculations; rather, the majority of interpretations, when they fall into re-interpretation especially, show their true nature: bold lies!
The truth does not really leave room for interpretations, and in most cases where the interpretation does take place, despite the unequivocal expression of the truth, the person who interprets would require the re-evaluation of his own real qualities and abilities, the increase of self-esteem and real feeling of our own value, things that help us open up to the truth instead of leaving our mind and soul barricaded in our own interpretation, most of the time being erroneous by its very nature.
How can we get rid of the fear of others interpreting what we say and do?
The first step is to be authentic in everything we say and do.
When you are authentic, it simply does not matter how others interpret your attitude.
Another very important step is the pursuit of the common and personal good in everything we say and do.
When we follow what is good and right, what do we care about interpretations?
As a person who often ends up interpreting the gestures, words or actions of others, I should be increasingly concerned about how my mental health can affect others.
A few visits to a psychologist and following a rigorous treatment, psychotherapy and following some real personal development courses through which I make a clear commitment to develop my personality to such an extent that I can contribute to the well-being of things in the community of which I am a part, instead of worrying about the interpretations, it helps me a lot to solve every day a part of the causes that lead to this defect left from times of sad memory.
But is interpreting the meaning of someone's words or actions just a flaw?
Or does it also have a good side?
Yes, the fact of interpreting the meaning of someone's words or actions has a good side: of course it is useful when we are observed or approached by strangers who want to profit from us, steal our goods, or appropriate them improperly things that don't belong to them!
Then it is good to make maximum use of the ability to interpret the attitude, words, body language and actions of those around us who are waiting for the right moment to harm us, who want to steal something from us or take advantage in some specific way of after us!
I wish you success!
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